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Friends in this day

Friends in this day

          The word friend what does it mean? According the Webster’s dictionary a friend is defined as 1[a person whom one knows likes and trust] 2 [an acquaintance] 3 [a person allied in a struggle or cause: comrade] 4 [a supporter, sympathizer, or patron of a group, cause, or movement]. Upon reading this it makes you take a second look at yourself and those you call friend. Are they really my friends? Have I been a friend to them? These questions come to mind and force you to take a closer look and examine what it is to be a friend. In my examination of my own feelings towards friendship I discovered, that I too have failed to be the best friend I could be. For instance sometimes I did not listen as much as I should or think of what my friend may be dealing with, so there were moments I lost site of my friends feeling, in other words I lost compassion for them, a key ingredient in friendship. With out the proper elements, like love respect understanding and a common goal how can we have friendship? One can only wonder.

            In this day and age friendship has taken on a whole new meaning. I guess we can blame it on technology but I think it’s deep than that, I think like so many other thing in life we play the blame game to much. We blame T.V. and Radio for the way our children act and that so weak, because most of what we see from them, comes from us, the broken down parents. It’s time we show some responsibility for ourselves and stop putting the problem on others, when we must be willing to handle our own troubles. We have to start by putting our best foot forward and not giving up on real friendships real contact, physical mental and spiritual, so we can quit creating illusions and calling it friendship. What do I mean, I am talking about, internet relationships and other loose forms of friendship that don’t have the substance to become anything more then a passing fades. With out engaging in real dialog and establishing some sort of cause to help bond the friendship it can never be real. Am I saying bake off all net relations, no that not it, just put something concrete in to them, or they will turn out like all your other failed relationships.

          One can understand the attraction to loose friendships because real friendship can be hard work. You have to be open, respectful, and trusting among other things, like loving your friends and having genuine care for them, not to mention the risk involved in loving someone, who may not feel the same. Now you can see why we learn to take short cuts, that way we can have friends with out actually being at risk or having to make the scarifies that friends sometimes make. Operating in this way we become desensitized and afraid of our real feelings and our true capacity to love and be loved. Sadly we miss out on all the goodness that healthy friendships can provide. Being in love can be a great feeling but it can also be challenge and painful. Listen I know it feels good to know that there is someone in your corner but I have found it feels just as good to be there for someone. Stop being afraid and look at this way if you love someone and they don’t love you who is hurt, on one because when you love there is a gift for that person as well as yourself.  Even if they can reciprocate the love you show it dose not lessen the good feelings you have when you love. The only way it can have a negative effect on you, is if you were only given in the relationship with expectation of it being given back to you. Sorry to this always brings heart ache on you. So friends give the gift of friendship just because and for no other reason than it makes you feel good any other reason is a waste time.

                           Peace to you until peace comes to us all.

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